Hey, let’s talk about something else for a minute. I’m working on a little project this evening, and I thought I would thoroughly abuse my authorship privleges and my captive audience here to enlist some help.
Rolando Villazon

Rolando Villazon

Now, this evening, my beautiful seven-year-old son was brushing his teeth for bed, and started crying as he looked at himself in the mirror, because he remembered that some punkass punk  in his 1st grade class made fun of his eyebrows — called him a unibrow. I knew this was coming, because he has the famous Sanchez eyebrows that run in the latin side of my family. It’s going to be a while before he grows into them, but when he does, watch out! Under those eyebrows, he’s got these enormous, expressive dark eyes. He’s going to be killer. Arj Barker

David Byrne

David Byrne

He’s asleep now, and I’m on the internet collecting pictures of gorgeous men (plus Frida Kahlo) with prominent eyebrows, so that when he wakes up, I can show him. I don’t want him to think he needs to change a thing about himself.

I know that kids can be cruel, and what I really want to do is help him

George Harrison

George Harrison

 to feel confident about this, so that he can return fire with something funny. So, I’m also trying to think of some good come-backs for him that he can keep in his back pocket if the occasion arises again. If you can think of any good one-liners, I would love to hear them! I’m too Mama Lion right now to come up with anything that will not reduce the little fucker to mincemeat. And if you can think of any more guys who are out there rocking their unibrows, fill me in! These are the guys I have so far.

Buddha